Of Flags and Chavs and charters

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Once more it seems Labour are in the news for thinking that flying the English flag is racist, now the article concerned is an old one but signs are the view it expresses isn’t. Though of course the candidate concerned has since claimed they no longer hold those views, but as that’s rejected when it comes to UKIP candidates and the like I see no reason to accept it from a candidate for one of the established parties. The article has prompted Mr Farage to say that “Labour hate England”. I think he’s actually wrong on that and also doesn’t go far enough. For my money I think the problem is more that many people who see themselves as liberal and progressive , especially but not exclusively amongst those on the left, hate the English – or at least have a very strong dislike for them. It’s not England that they dislike so, it’s the English and English values which are of course notoriously difficult to pin down – so I’m not going to even try. I will though observe that the idea of flying the national flag is considered fine in Scotland and Wales and pretty much everywhere else it’s just the English flag that’s the problem. When you look at the comments made about the flying of the English flag it usually become rapidly apparent that behind that objection is a dislike for the sort of people they think are the types to want to display the flag. Given that the people normally making this assumptions are usually very quick to say that we mustn’t judge other groups by the actions of a few members (“not all muslims” et al.) why the exception for the English? Even amongst the allegedly tolerant alternative cultures (of which I count myself a part) there is a dislike of the stereo typically working class English based on the actions of a very few, so much so that they want laws against them. Again this is a group that is usually quick to object when anyone stereotypes any other group, but Toffs and Chavs are fair game, and those two groups are possibly the most typically English (albeit at opposite end of the spectrum).

Now there are many people who have pondered why there is such a dislike for the English, and some of their ideas suggest to me that they need to loosen their tin foil hats – however what ever the reason there does seem to be a dislike of things traditionally English. While Great Britain as a whole has done some terrible things in the past, things that certain regions like to now claim were all the doing of the English, we’ve also achieved wonderful and brilliant things – the 800th anniversary of one we celebrate this year. These achievements we hear far less of, it’s almost as if there is a plan to destroy all pride in being English – so much so conspiracy starts to seem like the sensible option. Now before someone chimes in and says that pride in one’s nation is a bad and foolish thing, first tell me why it’s seen as acceptable for the Scottish, for example, to be proud of their identity? Also if we shouldn’t be proud for the good our nation has done in the past then why should we be ashamed and apologise for the bad? If I was a suspicious type I could quite easily start to buy into the idea that our political masters are afraid of the English, the Scots and the Welsh seem to be happy to vote for more and more state control, the English less so. Perhaps we should still believe that desire for liberty, for freedom from repression, to fairness, justice and being left the hell alone still burns deep. that though is probably just playing to out dated stereo types and poetic fiction, right? Probably just me – we can ignore all the stirring verse and prose written in testament to it over the years as mere aberration.

The thing that made me really wonder about this was something surprisingly small, I wanted to buy a poster sized copy of the Magna Carta. This being the 800th anniversary of said document you’d have thought it would be surprisingly easy, I know I did. Oddly though the Magna Carta trust doesn’t sell one for less than £1,500, the British Library doesn’t sell one at all though it will sell you a replica of the American constitution. In fact, finding a decent size proper replica of this great document to buy in England turns out to be quite a challenge, it’s easier to find place to buy posters of the American constitution. The Americans will sell you a poster of our Magna Carta, but few places in the UK and of those even fewer and actual facsimile rather than a small twee poster. This seems incredibly strange to me especially given the year, is this great pillar of our country something to be hidden? (For the record I found a decent version over at Media Store House).

It really does make one start to think that for some reason there is a concerted effort to erase the English in all but name from the world, such thoughts though surely call for a tin foil hat. As ever when it comes to matters of English pride and the flying of our flag I shall leave the last word to Show of Hands.

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Digital glory holes

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A bit of a break from politics as articles about burying USB sticks in walls are once more doing the rounds. These are not new articles, they just seem to get picked up and re-circulated every now and again. So far I’ve not seen any of the these USB sticks, I suspect I don’t frequent areas with a high enough hipster quotient. To save you reading the article the theory is something like this – it allows for an anonymous off-line file sharing mechanism. So a bit like the old hiding messages in walls that I read about in something like the ladybird book of spy craft many years ago – except it’s less useful and more dangerous.

Just in case you are for some reason thinking it’s a good/cool idea or even worse are considering using such a thing consider this. Unless you encrypt the data you put on the stick it may be modified, even if you encrypt it, it may be removed by anyone and if you want to share with specific people you have to communicate with them as to which USB stick you’ve put the data on. If you’re going to communicate a location with them you may as well just hide an SD card or USB stick somewhere only they know so there’s more hope they’ll actually get the data. About the only thing that these public drop boxes are useful for when putting data onto them is to share data with random strangers who might happen to check the USB-wall you’ve used. Not the most effective mechanism for sharing ideas especially when you consider that the people using these USB-walls are probably not the sharpest tools in the box.

Now you may think that’s a little unfair of me, as the idea sounds cool a bit like a lucky dip or a treasure hunt – who knows what you’ll find. Well a lucky dip is a good analogy as long as you like your lucky dips randomly laced with broken glass, razor blades and other such things. The problem is you don’t know who’s put what on the USB stick you’ve connected to and well not everyone in the world has benign intentions. Consider that you’ve no idea what may be on the stick you connect to, the only way you can find out is to copy the data to your own device, now consider that possession of certain digital files is a strict liability offense – still want to check what’s been left on a random USB device plugged into a wall? Of course it’s not just files of dodgy content that you need to worry about, there’s also your usual malware and viruses including unfixable attacks or perhaps the USB connector you see isn’t actually a USB stick but something more malevolent that might fry your laptop.

So if anyone you know shares an article saying what a cool idea these wall embedded USB sticks are please slap them upside the head with a clue-by-four and tell them not to be so stupid.

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By their supporters shall you know them

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There is a theory going around amongst people of my acquaintance that the best way to judge a political party is by looking at who supports them. Now I think this is nonsense as political parties don’t really have that much control over their membership let alone their supporters, plus of course if someones political allegiance gets reported or not is rather dependent on the media’s agenda. So this theory is actually more “you can judge what a party is like by who the media tell you their supporters are” – which is even sillier. Despite this theory being really rather silly it does make more sense than paying attention to the Labour manifesto as they went to court to prove we shouldn’t believe it. If you’re going to judge a party by what the media report about its followers I’d suggest just going by what they suspend or expel people over as that probably gives a better idea as to what sort of behaviour a party finds acceptable. However as this isn’t my theory, and these people of my acquaintance do seem very keen on judging the “real beliefs” of a party based on media reports of select and sometimes only alleged supports I thought I should take a look into it. Now it may come as a surprise to you that the only party that this theory seems to get applied to is UKIP – they of the bigots, fruitcakes and loons. So as that’s already been covered I won’t bother with them, I also won’t bother going back over the whole expenses scandal that covers the three “mainstream” parties. That would be too easy. Lets see what else the supporters of the other parties have been getting up to, that we may better tell what the parties are really like.

Now obviously to match the “research techniques” of those holding forth the “UKIP supporters show what the party is really like” view I’m having to be quite lazy and cherry pick data. That however is ok as it’s following the best traditions of modern politician research. With that established lets look at what the other major parties are really like.

Labour is the go to party for Pedophile supporters, violent thugs and those that like punch ups. It’s also ideal if you don’t want the out of work represented, and if you want to be sure that you can’t trust the manifesto.

The holier than thou Liberal Democrats are ideal for fans of historic Child abuse and lots of Sexual harassment -not forgetting perverting the course of justice and Car bombing. Really the party for the modern family.

Or there’s the Conservative party still providing strong support for child abuse but with the bonus of supporting the EDL and exploiting illegal immigrants

Maybe all that child abuse isn’t your cup of tea – well there’s always the Green Party ideal for all you anti-semites, russian fifth columnists, enviromental vandals and general terrorism.

Now I was going to stick to just the national parties but as they are so popular it would be remiss of me to not mention the SNP. The SNP are really the go to party for threats abuse and intimidation and teenage sex.

You know now I look at it I think there must be something to this theory after all. I mean why would you want to be associated with a party of bigots fruitcakes and loons when you have that lot as alternatives?

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